Daily Sweeper, 11.9: It’s Gullit, but Is It Worth It?; More About Last Night…and a little benign evil

“The essential quality for an MLS coach is making due – or, god forbid – excelling under the restrictions handed down from MLS HQ. As Walsh points out, the foreign coaches currently coming up in these searches worked for clubs who had seriously deep benches and who, given so much as the perception of need, could buy nearly any player they wanted. The question in MLS isn’t how well you can make a team perform with a World First XI, but how well you can perform when Eddie Gaven looks like your best offensive threat and Alejandro Moreno constitutes a serious upgrade.”

Some smart guy wrote that…well, it was me, actually, and just a couple days ago. And that makes me wonder why I was so wishy-washy-wait-and-see about the Los Angeles Galaxy’s decision to sign Dutch great Ruud Gullit as head coach in yesterday’s Daily Sweeper. If you want the above argument fleshed-out and improved upon, check out Andrea Canales’ piece on the Gullit “gire” (sorry) for ESPN. Getting back to me, the more I think about this, the more I think Gullit will struggle with the Galaxy. This isn’t a lonely position. Soccer By Ives expects to be underwhelmed, while some penpal of Sideline Views’ Andrea Canales’ predicts a one-year-and-out tenure before Gullit freaks out on the Galaxy’s unique brand of madness (it can only be unique when it’s centered on one man). Whether it was what I read or thinking about it a little more, put me down as predicting nothing spectacular. It’s nothing against Gullit. I followed the EPL pretty closely back when he coached Chelsea, then Newcastle, and that’s about what he got there.

For the record, I’m going to resist acting on the urge I had to change every “h” in this post to a “g.” Crap, that’d be annoying.

– Seeing as I’ve already said my piece on the subject, I thought I’d pass on a couple things about last night’s game. First, Blue Blooded Journo wrote up a happy thank you to the New England Revolution and his fellow fans and let me pass on my congratulations to him and everyone else from the West Coast posse, malnourished and feeble as it is; let’s just say, when the umbilicus attaching you to a team (can I call them “Mom”?) gets a little longer, the intensity wanes a bit. Being there matters, where the noise and atmosphere wrap you right up in the frenzy; ditto for the shared pain of the losses. Coming from the other side, Luis Arroyave turned his Red Card blog over to the fans (in the comments at least) for Fire Nation’s thoughts on last night. To attach a word to it: scathing.

GOALSeattle.com announced that a local pub called The George & Dragon will host some kind of MLS-related announcement next Monday. You can find details on the occasion in the post, but what you won’t find is this: prior to being the George & Dragon Pub, the same building was called The Midget Tavern, a place where half the trips to the (tiny) bathroom involved navigating around dudes either selling or snorting blow. My how times and places change…still, looking forward to the announcement.

– Bob Bradley announced the roster for the South Africa friendly. Rah, rah. Maybe I’ll get caught up next week. Now…not so much.

Turning, now, to the benign evil….

…may as well start it off easy.

– If you’ve never seen Jimmy Kimmel’s unneccessary censorship bit, it’s pretty funny.

– I’ve been known to kill time with online video games and, coming from a time when Activision games for the Atari 2600 served as the gold standard, the awe of seeing as many free games as you can find on a site like Addicting Games has really never left me. Just this week, I found something called Feudalism that’s so readily playable, that I don’t intend to eat or bathe this weekend. But, thanks to b3ta.com, I found a (joke-) site for games that makes the 2600 look like Intel’s latest processor. Be warned: it looks like you have to download these things – and they look really, really crappy.

– Ah, Planet of the Apes action figures. They don’t make ’em like the used to – the commercials, I mean. The first couple clips aren’t so great, but wait till you get to the ones with narration. To give more away about my (somewhat advanced) age, I think I actually remember seeing some these commercials on the tube. The tower one in particular triggered something.

– Getting back to gaming, if this is the future, I don’t want any part of it. Check out the frickin’ weight.

– OK, here’s the (half-obligatory) gross one. It seems there’s this video lurking on the Internets involving precisely what the title promises: Two Girls and a Cup. If that phrase means something to you, you’ll know why it produces this kind of reaction. If you don’t, a guy name Jon LaJoie wrote a song about it and, if you click the “more info” tab next to the video, you’ll read exactly what two girls can do with one cup, and to each other, that would inspire this reaction. Or this one. For the record, I have not seen Two Girls and a Cup. I tried to find it in a half-ass way, but came up empty.

By the way, that Jon LaJoie dude is pretty funny. You can check out the rest of his stuff on his profile page. I didn’t do the complete ouevre, but did like Bastard Breakup and The High as Fuck Song; the latter doesn’t hit its stride till the “breakdown.” Look for the porcupine.

2 Responses

  1. I would feel more optimistic about Gullit’s prospects if he were also given the GM role and Lalas was let go. IF Gullit was given some time to develop the Galaxy into an intergrated club from the youth ranks on up with a Dutch system that teaches technical creativity and tactical acumen from an early age, then he could be of tremendous benefit to soccer in the U.S.
    The biggest problem with the MLS is that there is no significant investment being made in developing young players of quality. If he could be the first to bring that to the MLS and make it stick, his legacy would be enormous.
    As far as managing the team, IF he has a good eye for talent, he could be successful. Even with the salary restrictions, he can pick out the TYPE of players that fit into whatever system he envisions. Of course the players he has to select can’t match those of Barcelona, but the Galaxy is not playing against Real Madrid either. IF he has vision he could find players that he could help mold into the system he envisions.

  2. If I had to sum up the comments on The Red Card blog I would use: Overreaction. There were poor decisions, poor performances, and the result was less than what we would have liked, but everything wasn’t completely awful or completely devoid of anything positive. I take many comments immediately after a playoff exit with a grain of salt, for there are many illogical ideas and words thrown around.

    Unnecessary Censorship is friggin’ hilarious. Especially when they bleep out stuff from kids shows.

    Funny story about Two Girls and a Cup. I was in my music production class Tuesday night and the teacher had left the room so we stopped working and started chatting. For this class, I brought in a friend of mine who is interested in the class and she didn’t have a ride home. So somehow the conversation turns to Two Girls and a Cup and since my friend and I are completely sick bastards, we start to inquire about this video. We were warned multiple times not to watch it, but she and I decided to watch it when we got home. We were treated to the most appauling, grossest shit (literally) we had ever seen. After we watched it a couple more times, we decided to ambush our friends with it. We sent it to a friend who had a bunch of our other friends over and called him up to hear the reaction of everybody. The screams of horror and disgust were priceless and hilarious. That’s what friends are for.

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