One-Liner Guide to La Liga-Jornada 27

The one-liner guide to La Liga is coming back just like your in-laws every Christmas.

Ready? Set? Go.

Your Spanish Cosita

Pro Evolution Soccer. PRO, which is what the Spanish call it, is as much a part of the footballing culture as La Liga. Whenever groups of guys in Spain get together, everyone wants to ‘echar un partidito’ (play a little game). Some people take it a bit further and take Pro and tweak it to their liking. Last year’s edition, someone made a ‘La Sexta’ edition complete with Andres Montes and it is by far the best edition. Thanks to Swap Magic, I can play that edition when I’m home and relive all of my La Sexta memories with Andres Montes yelling all the time.

This one is one of games that people alter, called in Spanish, ‘parché’. In this game, everything is changed to Canal + which is one of the television networks that has La Liga games in Spain.

In case you don’t know who Montes is, here he is calling the Italy-Germany game from WC 2006 with the rest of the La Sexta crew.

La Semana Pasada

Here’s some of the week’s top stories.

–The return legs of the Champions League saw Sevilla knocked out in what some are calling one of the Champions League’s best games (not based on defense). Barcelona went through after winning at home against Celtic 1-0, but losing Leo Messi for 6 weeks (more on that later). Real Madrid went down against Roma 2-1 at the Bernabeu. It really should have been a 2-0 scoreline as Real Madrid’s goal couldn’t have been more offside if they tried.

–Speaking of Leo Messi, an article in AS.com today gives the following stats. In the last three years, Messi has been out 246 days and has had 7 different injuries. And, another interesting fact with that, Messi’s injuries have always come in games directly after he has sat on the bench (according to the Guardian Podcast..I obviously don’t have time to research that myself).

–Getafe are 2-1 winners in the UEFA Cup against a Benfica side reduced to ten men. With 2 away goals and with Getafe’s strength playing at home, they should have a good chance to make it into the next round in the UEFA Cup.

–To keep the revolving door going at Zaragoza, Javier Itureta has resigned as coach after six weeks at the helm. He was replaced by Manolo Villanova, who was coaching in the Segunda B, Group 2 (basically the third division) at SD Huesca. This makes Villanova the fourth coach at Real Zaragoza this season.

–Sticking with coaching changes, former Spain chief Javier Clemente is now the new boss at Real Murcia with the firing of Lucas Alcaraz.

— David Albelda had his day in court, but lost. The judge told Albelda that he could not authorize the 60€ million compensation for Albelda which is equal to his buy out clause in his contract. Valencia said he is free to go as long as a club will pay the buyout clause, which no team is crazy about.

–And this week’s Story of the Weird, Espanyol is letting their fans support them from beyond the grave as 4,000€ will get you a spot at the new Cornella-El Prat stadium, but only for 15 years.

This Week’s MENUDO PARTIDAZO

Barcelona v Villarreal
Sunday 3:00pm

A Leo Messi-less Barcelona want La Liga glory this season, but have a tough clash ahead with a very well rested Villarreal squad.

Saturday

Real Madrid v Espanyol
2:00pm

No rest for the weary as the newly eliminated Madridistas only have La Liga to worry about for the rest of the season while Espanyol are still in the fight for a possible Champions League position next season.

Zaragoza v Atlético
4:00pm

Jesus Samper was quoted earlier this week saying ‘Apparently the FOURTH coach is a charm, didn’t you all know that??’

Sunday

Sevilla v Levante
11:00am

The most lobsided match-up of the week brings the penniless Granotes into the Sanchez Pizjuan were Sevilla look to extract a bit of payback against the first team since their ousting in the Champions League.

Osasuna v Almería
11:00pm

Almería are still my newly promoted side to love as Unai Emery’s stock continues to rise week after week while Almería inch closer and closer to a possible birth in Europe next season.

Athletic v Valladolid
11:00am

Caparros went in ‘reverse’ as he did not include three of the Cantera’s finest chavales into the lineup in a scrimmage this week as promised. Now the question is pending, when will Madrid or Barcelona swoop in to the Basque country and take these kids away.

Racing v Betis
11:00am

This past week saw most beticos quickly become Fenerbahçe fans as the cucumbers got their wishes as Sevilla were eliminated from the Champions League. (But they are only three points away from relegation..shhh!)

Murcia v Getafe
11:00am

Newly promoted Javier Clemente looks to do right in his first game as head coach, but will have a tough task of dispatching a Getafe side amped with the possibility of European UEFA Cup glory dancing in their heads.

Mallorca v Recreativo
11:00am

I’ll be honest here, I’ve got nothing. At least..they speak Catalan in Mallorca.

Valencia v Deportivo
1:00pm

Ever Banega, fresh off a late night traffic stop/failed sobriety test said ‘I only had a little to drink’ as his response. Beware the kalimotxo children.

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