And Now For Something Completely Different: Nintendo..oh yeah.

(I take a break from CHI’s reguarly scheduled programming for my new segment ‘And Now For Something Completely Different’ Completely different being whatever I feel like writing about, once a week. That’s all)

This week’s virgin episode

‘The Ten Things In Nintendo That Make Me Want to Jump Off A Bridge’

I remember when I first got my Nintendo. It was by far one of the most impressionable days of my childhood. I instantly became a hero throughout the neighborhood, even though I looked like this.

(Yes that is in fact me, at age 8 years old, except don’t let the glasses fool you, I hit .875 that season, seriously)

The Nintendo came in all it’s glory, two controllers, and what the hell is this?

A gun??? Amazing. What you can shoot stuff??? Best. Thing. Ever

I placed in the Mario Brothers/Duck Hunt game in the console and played away. From then, my love for Nintendo grew immensely and my game total ended up surpassing about 100 games in it’s hayday. Complete with some bootleg ones I found at the local flea market in Buffalo.

Last night as I was playing my nintendo emulator on my computer while wasting a bit of time before soccer, I decided to play Marble Madness. You know, that game where you guide the marble on the screen trying to get to the finish before time runs out? I love that game, but was FLIPPING out when I couldn’t beat the ‘expert’ mode. This got me wondering, what else from Nintendo makes me want to jump in front of a fast moving car.

Well, here are my top 10 things in Nintendo that Made Me Want to Jump Off a Bridge

10. Marble Madness and that stupid f’ing level.
Yeah I couldn’t get past that damn level! And not to mention that I could get there EVERY DAMN TIME, but just couldn’t finish the job. The damn marble goes the wrong way, you have 20 seconds, WTF??? WTF??? I want to take that marble and just shove it up the game designer’s ass. He was probably like, wow, I’m just going to totally own everyone who gets to this level. I’ll show them.

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